Widukind Diary Entry #13

Topic 1) My fantasy baseball-inspired dreams keep coming. The memory of last nights experience is a little fuzzy, but I know it involved Francisco Cordero and hungryfortacos. For some reason, I accepted a trade proposed to me by HFT that involved Cordero coming my way. It was a good move for me, so I pressed "accept". However, immediately following this I realized that Cordero was a closer, and I was simply buying in to hungryfortacos' whole theory of drafting all relievers and them trading them away for position players. I got very upset.

Then I woke up.

Topic 2) The other day when I was trying to go to sleep I came up with the best idea ever; I formulated the ultimate signature drink for a bar to rip people off with and make hella $ (money). The process goes like this: You have a big refrigerator under the bar where you keep a whole bunch of green grapes, and a whole bunch of vodka (preferrably something like Popov to save $. Nobody will tell the difference). Then, you invent some hella catchy and trendy name for the drink, like "Grape Bomb" or "Vodka and Grapes" (if that's all you can come up with you're also probably gonna have to hire a Marketing specialist). When someone comes up to the bar and says, "Hey barkeep, gimme a Vodka and Grapes!", the barkeep gets out like six grapes, the customer places them in rows between his teeth thus opening his mouth, takes a shot of vodka, and then bites down on the grapes as a chaser/healthy alternative to Red Bull or whatever crap the damn kids are drinking these days.

Slap a $9 price tag on that beezy and you've got yourself a goldmine. Don't forget to tip!

Topic 3) This just needs to be said: bangs are a poor fashion choice for girls. Some girls look cute, don't get me wrong, but I have found it to be a 99.9% probability that they looked better beforehand. Just saying.

Topic 4) I like Rock Band. I think it's fun; it's easily the most inclusive multi-player video game ever made, and I respect that. But what I don't respect are people who get insanely good at it. I don't have a problem with people being good at other video games like Halo or Madden because they play out scenarios that regular people just have no chance of experiencing. But Rock Band (and Guitar Hero) are not like that. Why don't you just pick up a real fucking instrument? Granted, the argument can be made that the cost of buying a guitar (and potentially lessons) far outweighs the cost of buying Guitar Hero, but I'm going to counter that argument by saying that most people who have enough money to purchase an XBox 360 and Guitar Hero probably have enough bank to throw down on a used instrument. I'm just saying.

Out like Barry Zito (todays line 0.2 IP, 8 ER).