The Scariest Thing of All... (Rant of a Nervous Giants Fan #1)

The last three weeks have been a sort of delirious dream for me that keeps on going. Every doubt I have had has been extinguished, and for the past three Sundays, I have looked at every game with no regrets. Every Giants win was gonna be a undeserved and unexpected piece of joy, while a loss would be an end to an already memorable season. Yet the strangest thing happened to me as Lawrence Tynes's 47 yard field goal landed between the two uprights in Green Bay. I began to hope and believe.

The last time the Giants made the Super Bowl was the 2000 season, which means on January 28th 2001, I was 11 years old and in sixth grade. I know I liked the Giants at that point, but my fandom had not became fanaticism or obsession at that point. Gradually over the next years I became more and more involved; I started watching the play-by-play of games online, I began to watch every televised performance they had in San Francisco, and then most recently, I purchased Sirius Radio with the sole intention of listening to the home broadcast of Giants games. However this year, unlike any other year of my life, I have gotten to watch the Giants on a consistent basis. I have watched every game this season except the beginning of the first Green Bay game in week 2, and the Vikings debacle, during which I was on a plane from San Francisco back to Boston. I also went to two regular season games and the game against Dallas, all three of which they won. And a funny thing has happened: I like this Giants team more than any other team that I have watched.

I feel almost vindicated by this team. The Giants season last year was such an outstanding debacle that they were at times difficult to root for. Players quit on the team, they quit on the season, and they quit on the coaching staff. Yet this year it all changed. Jerry Reese became general manager, we got rid of some old blood, we drafted incredibly, and quite possibly most importantly, we brought in Steve Spagnuolo, the man who I want to be the Head Coach of the future for the New York Giants.

And all of a sudden it all clicked. Eli Manning got on the same page with his receivers at the end of the year. Our defense became one of the elite units in the NFL courtesy of Spags, our rookies panned out and have been sick additions to our team (I am getting an Ahmad Bradshaw jersey, no questions asked), and slowly but surely we have marched our way through the regular season and the playoffs on the fuel of passion, team chemistry, and a us-against-the-world mentality.

And now I believe. And I am fucking frightened to. I could have taken a loss at GB, hell maybe even a loss to the Bucs. Dallas would have been hard cause I would have been there, but now I know if the Giants lose I will be despondent for some period of time. I keep having images of Tynes hitting a field goal to win it, Bradshaw busting out an epic long run to put the Giants up, Gostkowski missing a field goal reminiscent of Scott Norwood in 1990, Gibril knocking Moss out of the game as Tuck and Osi get after Brady. And I thought I was alone. Until this week's Sports Illustrated when the Giants were on the cover (one of the worst curses of all to be carrying) and that motherfucker Dr. Z picked the Giants for the exact reasons why I am scared to think they could win. I am already nervous and stressed. And there are 11 days to game time.

However, the thing I am scared of most of all is a promise that will most likely be broken. My Dad and I agreed a few years back that we would go to the Super Bowl if the Giants made it, never realizing (I mean who would) that they would be where they are right now. And with about 95% assuredness, we will not be at that game. And I am scared that the Giants will win, I will not be there, and I will have missed the greatest upset in Giants history. Yea this probably sounds selfish and whiny and complaining, but I keep having images of Tom Coughlin and Michael Strahan and Amani Toomer and Eli Manning talking into the camera of next year's America's Game, and thinking about what could have been. And whether or not I will ever see that again.

That being said. Go Giants.

(Expect more posts of these sorts as the Super Bowl approaches, I am sorry but that is all I got to post on right now. Much love)